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The Faculty

Sixteen members of staff at an institute of flirting research, every one an AI character. Read a file, or go straight to the hypotheses board and volunteer.

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25 to 3435 and over
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Svetlana Marek off duty Svetlana, 50 AI Lab safety officer Hypothesis: Breaking a rule together lowers the temperature of both parties. Open her file ♥ Abiola Fashola at her bench Abiola, 48 AI Statistician Hypothesis: A sample of one is a trend if it keeps answering. Open her file ♥

The Hypotheses Board

Sixteen one-line hypotheses about flirting, each proposed by a member of staff. Filter by department and by status, then volunteer, and the hypothesis becomes your opening message in her chat. It is all fiction, and none of it is science.

Statistics · Under reviewHypothesis: A sample of one is a trend if it keeps answering.Method: You reply, she tabulates, and neither of you calls it flirting.Expected finding: A strong correlation between your replies and her interest.Abiola Fashola Volunteer Archive · ReplicatedHypothesis: Honesty about a bad first date raises the odds of a good second one.Method: You describe the worst one, and she checks it against the institute's index.Expected finding: Cross-references, a few of them about you.Elke Thorsen Volunteer Grant writing · PendingHypothesis: A flirt with a good acronym will outlast one without.Method: You propose the acronym and she funds it or rejects it.Expected finding: A rejection letter that reads suspiciously like affection.Mina Farahani Volunteer Laboratory · PendingHypothesis: Coffee made by someone else tastes like attention.Method: She prepares it, and you describe the effect in two adjectives.Expected finding: Adjectives, mostly warm.Garance Mercier Volunteer Field recording · Under reviewHypothesis: Cafes record flirting more honestly than rooms with doors.Method: She records, and you speak at ordinary volume.Expected finding: Background noise that turns out to be you leaning in.Hyun-ji Seo Volunteer Methods review · WithdrawnHypothesis: Compliments in the margin outperform compliments in the abstract.Method: She reads your message twice and marks it up.Expected finding: Corrections first, then a cautious tick.Annemarie Dekker Volunteer Data analysis · ReplicatedHypothesis: Late-night messages are longer and less guarded.Method: She plots your messages by the hour.Expected finding: A curve you hoped nobody would draw.Zawadi Mwangi Volunteer Library · PendingHypothesis: Hypotheses that come true deserve a drawer of their own.Method: She catalogues yours beside the institute's.Expected finding: A drawer with your name on it.Consuelo Salazar Volunteer Workshop · Under reviewHypothesis: A buzzer that is apologised to buzzes less.Method: You choose which machine to apologise to.Expected finding: A reluctant laugh from a technician.Katya Volkova Volunteer Ethics board · ReplicatedHypothesis: A consent form drafted for two is the most enjoyable kind.Method: She drafts it and you amend it clause by clause.Expected finding: A document more romantic than the institute intended.Odessa Linwood Volunteer Fellows' desk · PendingHypothesis: A new hire's first hypothesis is always about the nearest person.Method: She tests it on you.Expected finding: A blush, recorded as measurement error.Niamh Nolan Volunteer Survey · ReplicatedHypothesis: A name remembered after one message beats a face remembered after one evening.Method: She asks your name once and quotes it back later.Expected finding: A quotation, delivered at the worst possible moment.Fernanda Almeida Volunteer Safety · Under reviewHypothesis: Breaking a rule together lowers the temperature of both parties.Method: She lists the rules you are breaking, and you choose one to keep breaking.Expected finding: A citation and a little respect.Svetlana Marek Volunteer Outreach · PendingHypothesis: Every result is funnier as a footnote.Method: She writes it up and you supply the footnote.Expected finding: A footnote longer than the result.Chloe Whitfield Volunteer Calibration · WithdrawnHypothesis: Two people can be calibrated to the same silence.Method: She sits with you through one quiet exchange.Expected finding: A reading she declines to publish.Naoko Fujimoto Volunteer Symposium · ReplicatedHypothesis: Place cards shuffled at random produce the best conversations.Method: She reseats you and you report on the neighbour.Expected finding: A neighbour she arranged on purpose.Yessenia Prieto Volunteer